Ok, now I've more or less collected my thoughts properly.

When I refreshed the darn moe page today and saw the stupid press release, my hands turned cold immediately. My heart stopped beating for that second and my mind was in a blank. Can you imagine that horror...and my hands remained cold for an hour or so. And the very first thing I wanted to do was to scream. And take half day cos I didn't have the mood to work anymore.

So after that faithful press release online, I couldn't think at all. My mind was in a complete blank when I was talking to customers, to the extent I kept saying the wrong things. Plus my voice was trembling when I spoke. I didn't want to speak to anyone around me at all. I just kept smsing shuli, but honestly I can't remember what did I sms half the time cos I was really freaking out too much. And I think I have every reason to freak out because:

-I screwed up my GP and I know it cos I felt like crying when I was doing the stupid paper.
-I screwed up my Maths because I was so bloody careless.
-I screwed up my Econs cos I didn't finish the stupid paper.
-My Lit has always been screwed up so...yeah.
-I think the setter screwed up LEP more than I did, but there is always something called unforeseen circumstances.

And honestly speaking I know I didn't hit the standards I set for myself, which makes it even scarier. Even though I think the certs and all that are already printed and I can't help it now that it's been somewhat unchangeable, I still worry like shit. Bad case of anxiety.

I'm going to take leave on Sat. I can't stand the pressure of having my colleagues asking how I fare. Oh my goodness.

I am freaking out very badly. I have no mood to work anymore. Sigh sigh sigh sigh. The time has come.

Oh my god! So fast.

OMG THE RESULTS ARE OUT THIS FRIDAY.

I gonna die.

My nan xue zhang is so so so so so so shuai. Look at his eyes! How can anyone not like him.

Even though it happened a few days back, I still want to blog about The Incident of this poor working girl's poor working life to remind myself how immensely stupid and careless I am.

Tuesday was a relatively happy day for me. Because:
-My supervisor treated me to bakkwa which I ate happily while talking to customers.
-Mark the no.1 fan of 金枝玉孽 couldn't watch the last epi cos his TV broke down on that very night. It was so darn funny can! We ended up discussing abt that epi when we had no incoming calls.
-Eric promised to lend me 金枝玉孽 provided I call him shuaige everytime I see him sigh.
-Ricky gave me chocs for vday. Which made me paiseh cos I didn't get anything for anyone there duh and he always helps me out with very troublesome and irritating customers.
-Pekky dear got me the biscuits I wanted.

But the relatively happy day was ruined when I lost the stupid locker key.

When I was happily packing my stuff, I realised my key was gone. Disappeared into the thin air. I was so shocked. I looked for it franctically, but it just refused to appear. This got me very anxious cos my bag and everything else were in the locker. The only thing I said to myself was "Die liao I'm going to be in deep shit."

So after a few phone calls and a mad search for the spare key, I got my stuff out. My night was totally ruined by the stupid key I tell you. I couldn't help moping over the lost key, until Alex told me there was nothing I could do cos the key was already gone.

True. So now I stopped worrying about the lost key which I suspect got flushed down the toilet bowl. Now I'm worrying what is going to happen to me when I go to work tomorrow. Seriously I think I'm in trouble.

Sigh.

At this unearthly time at 8.23am when I will usually be sleeping happily in my bed, I am typing away in the office boohoohoo. But still...

Happy 19th birthday minsee! =D May you have many more happy days to come!

And yes you should laugh at me less often. You are supposed to be nice to me remember. Make that your no.1 birthday resolution (:

Yah and I hope you get a boyfriend. I'm hoping for myself too :( Haha.

Cos today is your big day, I shall sing feilunhai's songs for you later.

I think some of my colleagues are afraid of me. Either that or they dun like me.

Because whenever they see me approaching them, they know it surely won't be something good. But then if it's something not bad why would I approach them anyway haha.

Mr Long Legs will give an apprehensive look when he sees me coming towards him. If I tell him I'm not looking for him, he will look relieved and laugh. If I give him the follow-up form, he will give the "hai I resign to my fate"look.

I gave him another form just 30mins before knock-off time and he asked hopefully, "This will be the last one right?"

The person who is taking care of us temps is coming back tomorrow. L.L says he can't wait for him to come back cos that will be a 解放 for him.

This another colleague asked if he can pretend not to know me when I got him to help me attend to this customer. Cos this customer has many glorious records on his database. Haha. I told him I will treat him to a drink. L.L overheard and asked why I didn't offer to treat him one.

Darryl saw me smiling sheepishly at him and knew immediately he had to help me. And I owe him a lunch. He keeps nagging about it.

Only Mr Nice and Friendly guy didn't complain.

But I improved so much already! I ask for help less often now you know! Sigh. I dun like to keep asking them as well, it's as if I'm giving them a burden. But I can't help it if I keep getting weird calls right?

I can't help it when a customer demanded that a technician attend to him immediately since he couldn't wait for a mere 15 mins because he was sick and ate medicine that made him drowsy he needed to sleep within a short period of 15 mins.

I can't help it when a customer couldn't surf wireless and forgot to tell me that he applied for wireless through his mobile line. How I know you can apply for wireless through a stupid mobile line?

I can't help it when a customer called in to ask about some dunno what business phone line thingy which she hopes to be connected from some cable from dunno where. Even L.L has never heard of this before.

I can't help it when some stupid people called the wrong department and stupidly thought that the fault lies in me cos I dun understand what she said. Hello her accent is so strong can! Plus I dunno so many technical terms in Chinese. Try telling me what is GPRS in Chinese. Twice she called the wrong dept, twice I received her calls, twice I transferred her calls. I dunno if she can't understand the instructions by the voice message or what.

The problem simply lies in the fact that customers assume we are some psychic geniuses who can read their minds, know every minute detail without even probing them and solve all their problems in a nanosecond. They seem to forget we're only mere mortals.

Sigh. Today I was typing away on the keyboard when I suddenly felt very sick. Sick as in sick of what I'm doing. I felt like quitting. The only thing on my mind today was my very precious off day on Friday.

But I just attribute it to PMS. Hopefully the big M doesn't come during CNY...as much as red is a heng heng colour lol.

I will ask if my changing of shifts is successful tomorrow. And I must remember to treat my colleague to a drink. Plus the lunch.

I dun want my results to come out before CNY leh. I dun think I can stand relatives asking me how are my results when I visit them. Maybe I should work during that 3 days. Sigh.

Friday screams: It's off day again!!!

Nowadays the only times when I'm truly happy are having lunch breaks, knocking off and having off days. Hahaha. The life of a no-life working girl.

Yesterday I went to work a relatively happy girl cos the person I dun really like (ie the person who likes to por the perm staff and wear a "I'm so capable look") wasn't present.

Then the relatively happy girl became a relatively sad girl when a customer scolded her until she wanted to cry. As in I could feel the tears forming. Actually it was partly my fault lah cos I didn't bother to take down his details cos he called the wrong dept that moron. But anyhow, I hope he gets warts on his tongue or something. Better still lose his voice.

Anyhow I was very thankful for this perm staff for offering to help me attend to that bloody customer. I think it's because he saw my 苦瓜脸 hahahaha. Whenever I make a 苦瓜脸, he will know something is wrong and help me out. If not I'll keep disturbing him with many questions. So, here's a big Thank you Darryl! Though he's not reading this haha.

Actually I feel very lucky to have nice colleagues who are willing to help me out whenever I have problems. Some of these nice colleagues are also the ones who like to laugh at me cos I'm always so blur. Incidentally they are also the ones who like to disturb and tease me during work because I always believe whatever they say. And yes they are the lamest people I've ever met. And I thought I was very lame already.

But sometimes I can't help but wonder if they are truly sincere and true to us or just putting up a front. Because somehow there's this notion that the working world doesn't speak much about sincerity and doing things from the bottom of your heart. Even though I always believe that the people I interact with at work are really sincere and friendly to me. Well hopefully I'm not thinking too much. Cos from what I observed the dept seems like a big family.

I have to work on Sat and Sun! Sad. Hopefully my changing of shifts is successful. *cross fingers*

Next Friday is xuemin's day! Lol. I'm quite excited about the visit to the museum actually. I like history (:

OJM call me when you're free! You haven't updated me about your life!